End of sorrow part six

Andrew lost his fiancé two years ago. He was still not over her. Then he got a new neighbor.  A bubbly outgoing penticoastal girl named abby. Abby is determined to bringing andrew out if his doldrums.  It was proving harder then she anticipated. 

For a time she decided to back off. She gave him some space.  She invited herself to a picnic at his church. Now they were headed to her church for the saterday evening church. 

“I am not going to melt or spontaneously combust am i?” andrew asked. “You never know. There is this weird stain in the lobby.  No on wants to talk about it!” she said. “Funny! ” he said. “You will be fine. ” she assured him. 

He parked the car. They excited the car. At some point in the walk up they started to hold hands. It was unclear who inciated it. Abby realized they were holding hands again. She decided to conduct an experiment.  She took her hand out of his. He took her hand back.her heart started to pound. He smiled at her in a way she had never seen him smile before. 

He held the door for her. A couple friends came up to them. ” so you really excist!” her friend james remarked. “Was my existence in question? ” he asked. They laughed.”a little. ” april said.   He laughed.  “I do exist! ” he said. They laughed.

They walked in. They sat down. Abby was getting woried. Everytime they had a breakthough he withdrew. She was not sure he was really ready to fully embrace her. He had gotten swept up into the moment. She feared he would panic and withdraw again. She was nervous.

Mayby this was a bad idea.mayby she had gotten swept up in the moment. She had to stop herself from panicking.  

“You got qiet all of a sudden. You ok?” he asked.  “Yea im fine. ” she said. “Just making sure.  ” he said. 

During the worship time abby sang and danced and raised her hands. Every once in a while she whispered to him asking him how he was doing. He said he was fine. He laughed. 

After the service they mingled quite a bit. Eventually they made it to the parking lot. They went to the car.”what did you think?” she asked. “The preaching was good. Not quite as good as my pastor but it was  good. ” he said.

They went to the car. They got into the vehicle.  “I am really glad you came! ” she said smiling. “I am glad i did too. ” he told her. The car headed to there street. 

They talked for a bit on the steps.”i had a good day with you!” he told her. “I had a good day with you. ” she said.  They said there goodbyes. She went inside. 

She felt anxious.  She did have a good day. It was amazing.  She feared that he really was not ready.the shadow of liane lingered. Mayby she should just walk away. She did not want to. 

 She was falling in love with him. He was who she wanted to be with for the rest of her life.  He might never be there.  Liane had become larger then life. She started to take on Mythological proportion.  Abby could not hope to compete with a legend. 

She started to cry. She had no idea what to do. She believed that the lord was bringing them together. It made sense. She hoped That he could move on. This was harder then she ever could have imagined. 

Later that week, andrew got a phone call. “Hi mom!” he said. “Andrew i wanted to talk to you about something! ” she said. “Oh?” he said.

“Abbygail really likes you. ” his mom said.”i know she does. I think the world of her. She is a spitfire but she is a sweetheart.  ” he said. “Andrew. I dont think you understand. ” she said. “What do you meen?” he said.

“She really likes you. I think she thinks that you and her might have a future togerher. A lasting one. “She said. “I see. Are you sure?” he asked. “Yes i am.” she said.

“Did she tell you that?” he asked. “No. She did not have to. Look i know liane’s death was hard on you. It breaks my heart that you have to go though this. You have had to deal with things no one should have to at your age. Abby has feelings too. Do not hurt that girl andrew! If you cant give her your heart or you dont want her, tell her.  Saver all ties now. She wont like it but she will get over it. Do not string her along. Dont make her wait foever for you if you cant commit. Do not do it! ” she admonished him. 

“You think im stringing her along?” andy asked. “Not intentionally  but that is the result never the less. A double minded man is unstable in all his ways. “She told him. ” i know that.  ” he said. “Do not hurt her.either be in it or be out. Do not try to ride the fence. ” she said.

“You think that is what i am doing?” he asked.  “I do. I know why but its not fair to her. “She said “i had not thought of it in these terms.” he said.

“Your under the impreson that she will wait for you forever but she may not. Some penticostal may scoop her up. She wont wait foever. She may want to and plan to. If you keep rebuffing her and someone else comes in. She still go with him. She just will.if you keep on this road you will lose her. You will. I gurente it. I would really think about this. I would decide now. She wont wait not foever. ” she said. 

He knew she was right . he had not condidered any of it. He did not consider her leaving him and moving on to be a real posibility. His moms words were like a splash of cold watter on his face while sleeping. He did not know what to do. Could he say goodbye to her foever? Could he fully embrace her.he just did not know. 

End of part six. 

Next up 

Andy sits down with abby for a heart to heart.  

 The target part two

National security agency 

“You wanted to see me? “Andrew Greer asked. “I do. I am reluctant to talk to you about this. It could be nothing but it could be something. “Dillon holis said. “Alright. What is it?”Greer asked. He flashed a picture of a young women with her young child. 

“This is Kelly Dearborn. Twenty three years old.she  works as a administrative assistant in a lawyer’s office. She has an associate degree as a paralegal.she has one daughter. Aside form a parking ticket she is a law abiding citizen. Up to date in her taxes. She does not vote.not politically active. She has been doing a lot of research into the activities of the president. His schedule . She is spending a lot of time keeping up on the president activities intinesry. She has spent a lot d time on line looking at alt right message boards libertarian and Alex Jones and fringe groups. She done a lot of research into hard right groups,white supremacists and right wings groups with direct or indirect ties to terrorist or suspected terrorist activities. She seams to be associated with this man. Craig  Walter craven . Craven is proponent  of ligelizing  merijuana.  He is showing signs that he may be heading towards becoming a domestic terrorist. He shows sign of being a peeper and a survivalist. ” He said. 

“Do you believe that she is going to become radicalized? “Greer asked. ” I don’t know. She has no signs of being extreme. Her internet activity has become very alarming. I don’t know if she is becoming a terrorist. It is concerning. “Holis said. 

“What would make a single mom with no interest in politics suddenly become obsessed with the government?”Greer asked. ” She was the victim of a sexual assaults a few years ago. The rapist was charged but let go. She could feel that the government let her done. She could find far right ,alt right and libertarian ideology attractive. “Holis said. “Craven we think he is a real threat?,”Greer asked. “He is in our rader. The secret service and homeland security is keeping a close eye on him.  ” Holis said. “I want a complete profile on Dearborn. I want to know everything there is to know about her.get me a profile on craven too. “He said. 

Kelly kept a close eye on craven. She scanned his face book,Twitter Instagram and other social media. He had a blog as long. His blog was very libertarian. It started off talking against merijuana prohibition. He had a detailed position paper o. Medical marijuana. He then eqaited merijuana prohibition with alcohol prohibition. Then his blog went form detailed opinion editorial to rants . He threw epithats at the president,his governor,senator and other officials. He made death threats. He was unhinged. Unglued. Kelly dad them.she did not just read them but she deconstructed them and deconstructed them. She knew everything there was to know about his writings. 

 The n.s.a thought that she was analcholite of craven. She was a fellow traveler.  They did not know that craven was the accused rapist yet. They did not know that she was stalking him. They figured that she was a groupie an admire perhaps a confederate and potential co consperitor. They believed she could be a threat to national security. 

Kelly spent most of her time not at work watching craven. She kept a close eye on him. She tried to understand him. Was he a real danger to the country. Was he all talk? Could he become a killer?  How far would he go? 

 ” You can’t beat me kel! ” An Imignary craven said to Kelly. He imagined him being in the room. “I have to try!”she said. ” You will fail. will always win. Your too weak. You are a croward. You are fragile. Your not strong enough to defat me. I have become  death the destroyer of worlds!”he declared. “Your not that scary. Your like the wizard of Oz. Your nopolien without the army. You are a little coperal. You think you become something. You think your what? Alexander the great? Ghandi, Rush Limbaugh , timmecveigh, george Washington? Your none of that! Your charles manson perhaps. You will be forgotten. You will fail!”she said. 

“You don’t believe that? You know I am a gient amount man. You know that I am not talk. I am hardly sound and fury yet signifing nothing. You know what I am . You know who I am.  As much as you say I will fade away to dust. You know that I am the future. I am a visionary . You just don’t like my vision. Love me or hate me you can’t ignore me” craven said. 

“No I will not ignore you! I will not fear you. You do not scare me?” She said. “Come on. Can we proceed without the bluster. I know your thoughts. I know how scared you are! I see your teers. You are not strong? You are week. You will always be a scared little girl. I will be conquer the world. ” Craven declared. 

The phone rang. She snapped to reality. She wiped the tears form her eyes. She tried to regain her composure. She looked at the caller ID. It was her sister. “Hey Kat? ” Kelli said. ” Hi Kell. ” Kat said. ,”How is it going?”Kelli asked.”good. Look Kell you have been so distent lately. Why don’t you and Mia come over. We can movie night.  “She said. “Not tonight. I am tried.”she said. “Tomorrow night? “She asked. “I have a busy day at work. I would rather just go home.”she told her. “This weekend then? “She asked. “I can’t commit to anything but we will see !,”she said.”,Kelli I am worked about you. You hardly leave the house. You don’t say much.  You OK?”,Kat asked. 

“I like being home . I always have. I am not dipresed or suicidal. ” Kelli tried to assure her sister. ” You can see why I would be concerned ?”she asked. “Yes I do. It is unwerented Kitkat. ” She said. ” Alright. You can talk to me about anything. “She said. “I know that.”Kelli said. 

Kat knew that something was up. She just did not know what. She was really worked. She did not feel that she was  at an intervention time. She feared that they might be close. 

F.b.i  field office. 

Special agent bannet donivin looked over a daily beefing. He looked over verious threats. The president was planing a visit to the city. It was donivin job to work with the secret service homeland and the white house to make sure the visit went without incident. He looked the briefings over. He looked over a file on craven. Then he saw a file on Kelly. 

She was pretty. She was young. She hardly looks like a threat.she looked sad.sbe seamed to be hiding her sadness. He still saw it. Perhaps other might not see it but he said it. He was a. Expert profiler. He had worked on profiling serial killer befor being put In charge with stoping terrorist attacks in the sate. He looked over the file. No one was sure that she posed a risk. They could not rule out her being a thread. He would have to keep an eye on her. He would.

End of part two. 

Prison tears 

It was so surreal. On day she was waking up her daughter.taking her to the sisters. She was at her job as office administrator. Now she had traced her pants suits for a orange jumop suit. Her bracelet were exchanged for shakes. Her apartment was now a cell. 

Her old life seemed to be a distent memory. Area days ago was not a life time ago. She felt like she had woken up in a parallel universe. She only wished she would wake up back in that other world.in that other life. She closed her eyes. She opened them. She was still there.notging had changed. It seemed nothing was going to change. This was the new normal. This was how it was. 

She already missed her daughter.she missed her sister. She missed her co workers.she had been quiet. She was private. She did not part-time have a sociallife.u less you counted Netflix.noe she was hear. 

She refused to cry.she would be strong.she would be stoic. Nothing was going to get her down. She was going to be brave.she would not be conquered by this. She wore the jump suit. She was barefoot.

For a time she laid on the bunk.she stared at the ceiling. She lived numbers. She counted the tiles.She loved to write things down.she wished she had anotebook. Paper was not permitted.notging was. Just her. She was hear alone.

She never minded solitude. She welcomed it. She wished she could have a book ,paper something.she read the various signs aorund the cell. That provided a little but if activity.it only lasted for a little bit. That bit old. She got bord  with that.

She tried to stay calm. She tried not to vostir crazy. How could shenot. It made no sense. She had a million thoughts.she had trouble processing it all. She wanted to write. That was not going to happen. 

A tear started to develop. It went down her face. She whiped it away. She then felt another.then several. She gave in. She let the tears come. Her stoism started to fade. She started to let herself fell what she felt. Her feelings were cominng to the service. Once they started they flooded.she let it. 

After a while she felt OK. She wiped her tears. She was OK for now.she was able to focus now. She felt slightly better.