Wedding party part four.

Six days until the wedding.

 Amber decided to visit her home church. She had not been back for a while. She was excited. To see everyone.  Tracy told her she could take the day off but be prepared to work on monday. She assured her that she would.  Tracy laughed. 

Matt got up sunday morning.  He showered then drabk cofee and had a light breakfast. He got ready for church.  He arived at the church and got ready for the service. 

He saw tracy at the church.  “Where is amber?” he asked. “She is at her home church.  She did say that she would come to our church tonight. She said you might want a break form her. ” Tracy said.

He laughed. He wanted to say never but did not. He just said something like “oh ok!” or something along those lines.  

Amber had a good time at her church.she was glad to see everyone. They were glad to see her. She was glad to catch up with old friends.  She enjoyed her life on the west coast working for the college but liked it hear in her home town. It would be hard to go back.  

Aftter church she went back to mrs. Davis’s home. She went inside. “Hello stranger. “Matt said. “Hi Matt.  “She said.”how was your church?”he asked.”it was good. I enjoyed seing everyone. “Amber said.

“So will be coming tonight?”matt said.”i will. I am excited to hear you preach again. ” amber told her. “I am glad your planing on comming. “He told her.

They went into the house. Everyone greated her. Amber helped tracy and his other sisters get lunch ready. Matt talked to steven tracy’s fiancée for a bit. 

They all sat down for dinner.matt liked that amber was there. It felt right.  She was a part of the family. He was glad she was hear. 

Dinner consisted of ham potatoe corn.there was aple pie for desert. After diner, mat went to his place to go over his sermon notes for a bit. Then he went to the church to set up. 

Poeole started to flood in. He left his office. He saw amber.  “Hi!” she said.he smiled. “Hi !” he said.  “Ready?” she asked. “I think so. ” he said. 

He started the service with announcements. “This week i will be kinda off kinda on. I will be preaching on Wednesday night. I will be in and out of the church this week.if you need to reach me you can try at the church or call my cell. You can also reach one of our deacons. I invite everyone to the wedding of my sister and steven brell. Our family is very excited. We will hope you will join us. ” he said. 

After a time of signing,  matt got up to preach. ” i want to talk tonight about our unchangible God. Hebrews tell us that he is the same yesterday, today and foever. The lord is consistent. He is a God of order.  He is a God of structure.  We can depend on him to never change his mind or standards. We can depend on his promises.  In galations, paul says that God never reniged on his promises to abraham. There were some within judism and in Christian circles that the mosaic law undid the abrahamic covinent. Paul says that nothing could undo the promises God made to Abraham.  God made this promise thousands of years ago. Because of His consistent character we can rely on that promise. ” he said. 

“The lord promised to never leave us or forsake us. We trust that because of his consistent character.  David said that he was young,now he was old but he had never seen the righteous forshaken. We trust that he will help us in the future because he helped us in the past. In first samual,the children of Israel put up a stone called ebanezer witch meens this far the lord has helped us. The implication is if God has helped us this far we trust that he will help us the rest of the way.  We look at what he has done for us in the past. ” 

“When moses was about to leave the scene, what do he do? He reiterated all that the lord had done. Joshua when he was about to die did the same. David at the end of his life told Solomon of Gods faithfulness. We can really on the lord because he has proven himself dependable.  ” he said. 

“We live in a world full of changes. It is said change is inevitable.  Life is changes. We are born babies. We grow, we learn to crall, walk and talk.we learn. We leave home. We gets jobs etc. Life is about change. We cant avoid it. We as Christians can realy on a God. Who does not.” he said.

“Our family and church have experienced changes. We began as a church that met in a motel. Then we perchased a building. Transformed it into a church. We went on the pastors fanily and 2 others to where we are. There were pitfalls trials. We did not know how it would turn out. My mom and dad trusted in the consistentcy of the lord. Faithful is he who promised who also will do it. ”

“Our family has seen changes. Myself and tracy and bryce have graduated high school and Tracy and i have graduated from bible colege. Bryce is in bible school. Kendra is about to start bible colege.  Tracy will soon be maried. The baby of the family will turn two. Life has seen changes. We lost our dad. Our pastor.  I steped into the pastor role. You saw fit to call me to be your pastor, God’s under shepherd hear in hagerville. Life has been full of changes some we see as positive some negitive. These did not take our lord by surprise.  We have seen his faithfulness in these events. We have learned from these events.  We have learned to trust in the lord.we have learned to trust in his unchanging character.  ”

“In lemantations Jeremiah weeps over the destruction of jerusalem. Judah was punished for its rebelliousness.  Judah fell to nubukanezzer and babylon. The whole book is a funeral durge for the nation. He says it is by Gods murcy that we are consumed every day. His murcy are new every morning.  Great is thy faithfulness.  Despite Israel’s rebellion against the lord. Despite his punishment on them, he would still be faithful.  At the end of saventy years they would be alowed to return. We see his faithfull consistent character. I rejoice in that. I depend on it.i know i can. ” he said. 

After the service, he closed the service.manny stayed behind and felowship. Matt mingled with various members and attenders. He had conversations with everyone. 

Amber mingled with various people. She had never attended hear on a regular bases. She knew people from her visits to the church . she lived in the area so she knew them from the town. Though she was not Baptist , she liked the church and liked the people in the church.  She always felt welconed hear. She never felt out of place even though she was a crazy charismatic.  

Many came up to matt and said what an encouragement his message was. Many could relate. Manny were experiencing changes. The mesege was very timely. 

After a while he saw amber. “Hi. I realy liked your mesege?” she said. “Thank you. It was not my original mesege for the night.  I could not focus. I kept thinking about evrtything. I decided to turn it into a summon . “he said. “It was a blessing. “She said. “Praise the lord!”he said.

“I missed your preaching. “She asked.”we post my surmons on line.”he said.”i will check them out. ” she said. 

At his moms house. “Ok i want everyone hear at eight a clock. Cofee will be on at 7:30. Breakfast will be served at 8:00. Then after breakfast we will go to the church after breakfast. We have alot of work to do.”tracy said. 

“This could be interesting.”matt said.”i get to be in charge.  “Tracy said.”i am not so sure about that.”matt said. They laughed.  

Matt stayed with his family for a while.then he went to his home. Again amber walked him to his car.they said there goodbyes.

End of part 4

 

Panic attack part 9

Previously  on  panic attack 

Jack the son of a pastor meets a young lady with a tragic past. At first she and her family are reluctent to accept him. After a time Kristin is wiling to pursue a relationship with her . she and her fanily put some stipulation on it. 

Jack was eating breakfast with his family. “So. Your mom and i were talking. We would like to get to know Kristin more. ” his pastor commented.

“We would like to have her over for supper. We were wondering if she could come tomorow night. ” his mom said. “I will invite her.” jack told his mom.

He figured that she would be open to coming over to dinner at some point. He had no idea of she would want to come over this soon.  He was almost afraid to ask her. He was not sure how his parents would feel if she declined or wanted a rain check.  He decided not to create a crises before it happened. 

Jack got ready for his day.  Then he dialed her number. “Hi krissy. ” jack said.  ” hi jack. How are you?” she asked.  ” good. How are you?” she asked. “Doing good.  Kris my parents were wondering if you could come over for dinner tomorrow.  ” he asked you.

“Tomorow?” she asked. “Yes. Is this too little prior nottice?” he asked. “No . yea i can come tomorow.  “She said.”awesome!  I will let mom know. ” he said. “Thank them for inviting me. ” she said.” i will do that. ” he said.

“I have to admit that i am really nervous. ” she admited. “I gathered  that.  It will be fine. They really like you. Mom and dad are realy great.  You have nothing to wory about.  I know it is going to go great. ” he assured her. 

“I do want to go. I. Just really nervous about it. I am just worried i will make a bad impresson. What if They dont think i am good enough of there little boy?” she remarked. “Now you know how i feel. I was so nervous when i came to diner at your house. ” he said. 

“I am not really good at this stuff. ” she said.  “It is really low pressure i promise.  Just relax. It will be ok. ” he said. “It is a good thing i love you and your cute!” she said. “You think im cute?” he asked. “Dont let it go to your head. Your not that cute?” she said laughing. He laughed.

“It really will be ok. ” he assured her. ” yea i know.  Ok i trust you. ” she said.”good.  I am really excited about this. I think it is going to be great. I really do. ” he said.  “Ok. I hope your right. ” she said.

After she hung up,  she went downstairs. “Are you ok kris?” ashly asked. “Yea. Jack’s perrents invited me to dinner tomorrow. ” she said. “Are you going to go?” her mom asked.  “I agreed to go. I hope i dont regret it. ” kristin said. “You seam realy nervous.  ” her mom said. “I guess i am. What if i say something stupid?” she asked.

“Well jack had to come to dinner with us. Its only fair that you have to go to dinner with them. ” her mom said. “I know. I am not really a good at this.  ” kris said.  “You will do fine.they already like you. You have there permission to date him. ” her mom said. “I realy want them to be my in laws someday. If i mess this up that might not happen. ” she said. “Dont worry about it. Just relax. You will do fine.  “Ashly said.

 Friday night came. It got close to being the time to go to the rayburn’s.she decided to wate a pink sweater with a gray skirt. She wore black shoes. She braded her hair. She went downstairs.  “Do i look ok?” she asked.  “You look great.  ” ashly asked.”you sure? ” she asked. “You look fine kris!” her mom said. 

She took a deep breath.  She huged her mom and sister. She went to her car. She got in. She drove to the home of the rayburns. 

 The jeep she drove pulled up at the  home of the pastor and his family. She hoped she had a few secconds to take a deep breath. She was sighted. Jack watched for him at the window. He walked out of the home. 

He walked over to her. He smiled and she smiled back. “You look realy nice tonight. ” he said. “Thank you. ” she said. He hugged her. They walked inside. 

“Hi kristin. ” mrs rayburn said.  “Thank you for inviting me. ” kristin told them. “Our plesure. We have wanted to have you over for a while now.  “Pastor rayburn said. “I asked jack if you had any alergies or was vegiterian or anything like that. ” his mom said.”i dont have any algeries. I am not picky at al. “Kristin said. ” i did not think so. ” mrs. Rayburn said. 

 The rayburns had five children aside from jack. Jack was the oldest at age 24 and the youngest was a year old. Kristin was seated next to jack and his sister kate. They serrved lasagna whitch she loved. 

 “So i hope Timothy and rachele are minding you well during there piano lessons?” mrs rayburn said.”they are doing very well. I am happy to them. I cant wait to start teaching anna. Someday little merissa. ” kristin said. 

“Mayby you can teach jack to play the piano.  ” his brother Philip suggested. “Yea. You dont want that. I think the two piano teachers decided to retire after trying to teach me. “Jack said. “He is the only rayburn in the family that does not play an instrament. ” kate said. “Aside from myself.  ” pastor rayburn said. 

” everyone has unique abilities.  Not everyone has to play a musical instrament. ” kristin said. “I can play the radio. ” jack said. “I am an avid radio player.  ” pastor rayburn said. The family laughed.

“My poor family has heard my corny jokes alot. It is nice to meet someobe who has bot heard them. ” pastor rayburn said. ” you dont have to tell them all at once. ” mrs rayburn said.they all laughed. 

” “so how do you like our church?” kate asked. “I really like it. Our whole family does. Everyone has been really great. ” Kristin said. “We enjoy your whole family.  Your family has been a great adition to the family. “Pastor rayburn said. “Thank you.  ” kristin said. 

“We try to have a family atmosphere at church. ” mrs. Rayburn said. “You really do. We apreciate how everyone went out of there way to make us feel welcomed. “Kristin said. 

The night was going well. Kristin enjoyed being with jack’s family.  ” so has dad checked your doctrinal satement?” Philip asked. “No i dont think that i dissagre on doctrine.  I read from king james bible,only wear dreses or skirts. I dont subscribe to penticostal or reformed theology. I am not neo evengelical and believe in separated from rommon catholism. ” Kristin said. “He is kidding with you. ” kate said. She laughed.  

“You dont listen to klove do you?” phil asked. Oh no she thought. She does listen to klove. She squeeze jack’s hand. ” you will have to excuse Phil.  He is stil young and does not always know when things are appropriate. ” jack said.

Then jack changd the conversation. As they had desert she  forget to take her anti dipresents.”oh no?” she thought.  She left it at home.she started to panic.  She got qiet. 

After a while, he went after to her. ” hunnie?  Are you ok?” jack asked. ” i forgot to take my antidipresent. ” she said.  “Are you ok? ” jack asked. “I think so.  ” she said. 

After spending time with the family they went to the steps. ” im sory i listen to k love. I know i probably should not. Thank you for helping me out. ” she said. ” no problem.  What are boyfriends for?” he asked. ” i hate that you have to cover for me! ” she said.  

“Its fine. ” he said. ” i should realy get back” she said. “You dont have..  oh ok.”he said. He remembered there rule. She went inside and thanked them for there hospitility. They thanked her for coming. He walked her to her car.

 His patents did not know anything was ary. ” you two make a cute couple.”mrs. Rayburn said.  “I think so.” jack said. “You really like her?” his dad asked. “I do. ” he said. 

Later that night she called. “Sory i left abruptly. “She said. “Its fine. ” he said.”are you sure? ” she asked. “Yes i am sure. ” he said.  

To be continued. 

 

End of sorrow part seven 

Previously on end of sorrow 

 Andrew lost his fiancée just before they were to be maried. A year later he met a penticostal girl named abby.she became his neighbor. She was interested in him romantically.  She did all she could to pesure him. He did not seem to be interested.  He tended to go back and forth.

His mom warned him not to go back and forth. She told him to be in it or not. She instructed him not to be in between.  She decided that she had to talk to her. 

He sat on his steps for a bit. He tried to short things out. He was ready to talk to her at least he thought he was.

He took out his phone.  He texted her. “Hey abby can you come out to the steps? ” he asked in the text.

They both had the rule that they would never be alone together until or unless they were maried. They haf never been inside the other’s apartment. They did not hang out on each other’s steps.  

The door opened.   Abby came out. She wore a blue shirt and jeens. She was wearing flip flops. She smiled at him.he smiled back.  “You summoned me? ” she said in a playfull tone.

She sat down next to him. “I wanted to talk to you. ” he said.”whats up?”she asked.  “My mom is woried i am sending you mixed singles.  She says if i keep hesitating, some penticostal guy is going to scoop you up. “Andrew said. 

” that is not going to happen andy. I would not let that happen. ” she assured him. “Its not fair. I dont want to hurt you. I do care about you. I dont want to see you hurt.” he told her.

“I know that. I know this is hard.  “Abby said.  ” in many ways liane and i dated sence we were little kids. I realy believed us getting maried was part of his plan. It made sense.  Everything seemed to be building towards that . that was no reason to not head in that direction.  Then in a split seccond,  it all changed. She is gone. My life my ministry it was all intertwined with her. I thought that was how it should be. Now nothing makes sense. I am lost.” he said. 

” i am not unsympathetic.  I would feel the same way.  To invest tbat much in someone else. ” she said. 

“I dont know where to go now. I dont know how to think or feel. I am not angery with God. I just dont get it. When liane died i figured i would be single the rest of my life. I had no desire to be with anyone. I had no desire for romance. Over time i became content to remain that way. ” he said.  

“Is that what you want ?” she asked. “I dont know. I did not think of it that way. I am not sure i have it in me to comit to someone. I am not sure i can be vanerable again.  I am not sure i am ready to love again. I dont know if i ever will. It is hard for me to let my gaurd down.  To embrace you. To even let you in. I find that dificult.i do care about you. I love spending time with you.   I love having you in my life. I gues i am sending you mixed signals.  I am truly sory for that. The last thing i want is to hurt you. Your so sweet!” he said. 

She smiled. She rested her head on his shoulders.  ” i know that.  I know you care about me. I know this is hard for you. I can’t begin to know all the things you have felt. The internal strugles. The not wanting to let anyone get to close to you. Are you open to the posibility of an us ?” abby asked. 

 “I am open to that possibility.  ” he said.  “I understand that you want to go slow. I ubderstand this is hard.  I know it will take time.  I need some commitment if your part. I need you to comit to us even if it is sometime In The future. I need stability secuity. I know we are not goung to mart tomorrow although it would be nice. I will wait if i know that i am waiting for something real. If there is something to wait for.  I cant wait for something that will never happen. If i know we are working towards something.  Something tangible. ” she said.

“Do you see me as your potential husband? “He asked.  “Yes i do. I have liked you sense that first day when i moved in. I would hornored to be your wife. “She said.

“I like you abby.i really do.i am afraid to open up again.  I am afraid to let my gaurd down.” he said. ” we are not in control.  Any control we believe we have is an ilisuon. We dont control anything. We dont sit in the drivers seat. We are not promised another second of breath.  What is our life is it even a vapor? Our times are in his hands.  I dont have a clue what the future holds. Im ok with that. I have never been on control not totaly.  I chose to rely in the one who is. Whatever happens. Though he slay me yet will i trust in him. This is not you. You are not living your existing. I have seen the real you. You cant keep your gourd up foever.” she said.  

“I know that. I know i am not in control.  I am ok with it. It is dificult. Do you want to mary me someday?” he asked.  “Yes i do. I think we will make a great couple. I want you to get back on tract. We will start a church as you wanted to. I will be a pastors wife. We will have kids. We will serve the lord together . are you open to us marrying eachorher? ” he asked. “Yes i am open to that. ” he said.  

“Look im not liane. I will never be her.  I cant be. I have a different personality.  Different background life experience.  I am a different person. I am far from a perfect person.  I have a lot of love to give. I have been told i have the gift of encouragement.  I would love to be able to be an encouragement to you. I think we will make a great team. ” she said. 

“You do really care about me?” he asked.”i do. I want to spend the rest of my life with you.  I am committed to that. I want that. We can take it slow.i just want you to commit to me. Commit to mariege in the future.  Even if it is much later.  As i said i l would marry you tomorrow but i am willing to wait as long as i am waiting for something. I am wiling to go on your pace. ” she told him. 

“I know your not liane. I dont want you to be her. I do like you. I love who you are. Your funy silly at times. I love your bubly attitude. I love the thought of spending the rest of my life with you. I like it alot.”he said. 

” i appreciate your honesty. I know it was hard for you to open up like this.  I want you to be honest with me. I want to get to know you. Keep opening up. You can trust me i will never judge you. “She said.

“I am sorr if i hurt you. I am Sory to send mixed meseges. ” he told her. “I was hurt i wont lie. I was discoureged. I need you to let me in. I need you to try. I need you to give me a chance. Give us a chance. I want to see you working at this. “She said. 

“I hate the thought of you with someone else.  ” he said. “I hate that too. I dont want to be someone else. I want to be with you. I am not going anywhere as long as you dont push me away.  Lets work on this together. ” she said. 

“Ok. I do want to go slow but at the same time i want to move froward. Will you be my girlfriend?” he asked. “Yes i will. ” she said. He smiled. He hugged her. She held on to him. Neither one wanted to let the other go. 

End of part 7.